I want to scream into the face of the bastard that invented Cheetos. Fuck, fuck, fuck … I’m addicted to those orange, salty, crunchy (I don’t like the puffy kind), death snacks.
That’s right, I called them death snacks. They’re bad as hell for you, I know, even though some time ago they tried to trick me by putting “no trans fats” on the package. Anything that orange has to be bad for you. It’s the same color as nuclear radiation on the Simpson’s!
cheetos nutrition facts
When tracking down the nutrition facts for the crunchy Cheetos, I found a site that said one of the good points of Cheetos was that they were low in sugar (!). Well, Mr. Cheeto gave them extra salt, so that kind of cancels out the benefits of low sugar, I think. Oh, and extra orange.
I wish I could remember the first time I tried these little devils … I think it’s when I moved to Boston for college, which made “secret eating” much easier … not a secret at all because I lived by myself! Since then I have been on a crunchy, orange road to Cheeto hell.
Now that I think about it, Cheetos might be the toughest food to secret eat … as soon as you touch them that orange coating is all over your fingers (which tastes wonderful when you lick it off your fingers). I’ll have to give myself a pat on the back for secret eating Cheetos without anybody finding out!
At least I haven’t totally gone off the deep end and started making Cheeto recipes …
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This post is hysterical. I don’t eat Cheetos because I don’t like them. But I do remember eating some sort of Cheetos product and I had to put the bag away. I tend to believe it’s the salt. Think about it. How many unsalted chips would you eat? Unsalted butter or peanuts just aren’t the same. My advice, don’t have them around you. Just don’t buy them. As a kid my mom have a very small food budget. It just didn’t allow for soda, chips, sweetened cereals or the like. They were never in our house. I hated the fact that we weren’t normal. But she actually did us a favor. My brother and I are both in our mid 50′s and we are both thin. My sister on the other hand, was born 10 years after me when money wasn’t as tight. She is 45 and overweight, regardless of her activity level.
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